Life is so… whatever.

Favorite hurts

with 15 comments

This takes me back to one day during EngJourn2 when, as an extension of our discussion over lunch before that class, Clar and I debated with Rob about forgiving and forgetting.

Obviously our side was the same as Ate Frances’: we’d like to forgive, but we just can’t forget, thus making the forgiving part difficult as well. I don’t know if it’s just a girl thing, or if Rob is just that nice that he can’t even comprehend how one can hold a grudge against another person. The debate was prompted by one of the talks during our (then recently concluded) retreat. I forgot who gave that talk but it was about having a favorite hurt and letting go of it.

Clar and I, though we both knew that the speaker was right and we really should let go, insisted that knowing you should let go and actually letting go are two different things. Rob insisted that not letting go was completely pointless. “Why do you have favorite hurt anyway?” asked Rob, as if the word favorite in that phrase meant the same as the word favorite in favorite color or favorite movie. We jokingly asnwered, “Because it’s fun?” because it was really funny (and frustrating) trying to make Rob understand how we were feeling about our respective favorite hurts. He was like, “How can it be fun???” LOL.

But really. It’s not as if we liked having a favorite hurt. Who likes getting hurt diba? It’s just that it’s the kind of hurt that won’t go away just like that. We know it’s evil to keep harboring negativity against someone and to find evil gratification in being evil towards that person (ha? ano daw?), but it’s easier than trying to (instantly) change those feelings. I guess you just gotta give time (lots of it!) for your favorite hurts heal by themselves, until one day, you just wake up and realize that maybe it’s not a favorite hurt anymore.

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Written by eeeek

March 26, 2008 at 5:38 pm

Posted in Musings

Tagged with , ,

15 Responses

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  1. one year after that debate (or tag team challenge haha) and a year into the complicated life in college, i kinda understand the idea of not forgetting YET. human nature i guess. someone told me i was living in a bubble, an ideal world and i guess i went to ateneo because i didn’t want to accept a ruthless and harsh world. but a year after, i begin to see first hand the kind of things my naive self wanted to put off. so haha i understand but the hardship should not keep us from doing what’s ideal i guess. anyway, our journey is really transcending human nature to be united with Divine nature so i guess the “favorite” hurt thing was hard for me to understand because i assumed there was no “goal” of getting rid of it hehehe.

    rob

    March 26, 2008 at 7:27 pm

  2. Aww, I forgive you Ray2. I’ll forget you too. Hahaha!

    Ben

    March 26, 2008 at 7:44 pm

  3. Wow. Somebody had the guts to tell you what we’ve all been thinking. :P Not that it’s necessarily a bad thing. I kinda envy your romantic view of the world. You always see the good. But awww not (so much) anymore na pala. Welcome to the world of the disillusioned. :))

    “but the hardship should not keep us from doing what’s ideal i guess”

    Yeah I know. We tried naman. But sometimes, the more you actively will it to happen, the more it doesn’t.

    “anyway, our journey is really transcending human nature to be united with Divine nature so i guess the “favorite” hurt thing was hard for me to understand because i assumed there was no “goal” of getting rid of it hehehe.”

    OMGnosebleed! :P Magpari ka na nga! :))

    eeeek

    March 26, 2008 at 7:45 pm

  4. Ben: Ok I will too. :P

    eeeek

    March 26, 2008 at 7:48 pm

  5. Favorite hurts — The term is interesting. I guess some people do have favorite hurts because they take pleasure in being the victim, in enjoying the sympathy and attention, and demanding that the world owes them a better life. Victim mentality is a sign of pride.
    But I suppose our case is different we don’t even want THAT hurt to linger in our memory. Puh-leeez!

    frances

    March 26, 2008 at 11:09 pm

  6. Yeah. I guess it really is a favorite hurt when you like being the victim. Haha, how masochistic. :P

    eeeek

    March 26, 2008 at 11:12 pm

  7. kasi in our favorite hurts, we’re the protagonists. we were the good ones and they were the bad. nalet go ko na yuing favorite hurt na pinaguusapan natin noon dahil narealize ko na accomplice to the hurt rin ako. once i realized that, how could it be a favorite hurt pa? :lol:

    clarisse

    March 27, 2008 at 8:32 am

  8. Tsk tsk, you accomplice! Ako hinde. Ayoko nga. Haha. Pero oh well, accomplice or not, I’ve let go too. So byebye favorite hurt. :))

    eeeek

    March 27, 2008 at 10:43 am

  9. knowing things that should be done and actually doing them are really two different things. haha.

    minsan kasi, alam mo yung dapat gawin, it’s just that hindi mo magawa. hahahaha.

    favorite hurt. yung talk ba yan ay yung retreat nung 4th year? hahaha…

    lugigi

    April 1, 2008 at 8:15 pm

  10. agree. totally different. masmadali ng sobra yung isa over the other.

    yup. :) talk 2 by kuya rocky. :)

    clarisse

    April 4, 2008 at 3:25 am

  11. omg. i forgot the talks na nung retreat! tinalk to nung retreat!?

    haha. rob, magpari ka na. and it’s sad that your bubble is starting to pop. I love your view of the world. Even if it sometimes become over idealistic. Still, astig yung views dahil nakkikita mo sa ibang “big picture” yung mga bagay. :)

    haha. i remember this argument at engjourn! hahaha. inaaway niyo nga si rob nun eh! and i was doing a physics hw? o math? anyway, buti naman nakalimutan niyo na ang favorite hurts niyo. ako, not yet. needs more, uhm, “doing” to heal. :P

    ryan

    April 6, 2008 at 2:00 am

  12. Igi: Yeah. Magkaiba talaga. Madali namang isipin na dapat ka mag-let go eh, mahirap lang talaga gawin minsan.

    Ryan: Nako, evidently not listening. :P Haha joke lang. Naalala ko lang yan kasi yan yung super tinamaan ako, haha.

    Harhar. Poor Rob, no more bubble. :))

    Eh kasi naman si Rob eh. Ayaw pa maniwala samin eh. :))

    And.. good luck to your healing. It’s hard but liberating when it finally happens. :)

    eeeek

    April 7, 2008 at 6:41 am

  13. wahahaha yikee wala na silang favorite hurts haha.

    rob

    April 7, 2008 at 9:54 am

  14. In fairness, may previous experience na pala na naapply namin ni Ray2 ang Let God and let go e. :D Hahaha. :))

    clarisse

    April 8, 2008 at 12:56 am

  15. Haha onga naman. Kaya pala super nagstick din sakin yung talk na yun. :)

    (Haha, naiinip ka na ba sa ILC entry ko? Hahaha, day2 pa lang ang nasusulat ko, haba eh. :lol:)

    eeeek

    April 8, 2008 at 1:00 am


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